the blasts, the fallout, the sickness and the diar[y]hoea

Is This My Nightmare Or Yours?

Bullshit Bob 2 is in a strop with me now. He’s sitting at his desk tapping savagely at his keyboard, each pointy little finger jab aimed at my imaginary heart or eye. He is giving me that kind of silent treatment specifically designed not to be silent, the type punctuated by heavy sighs and mutters under the breath. Paper is fiercely reorganized on his desk every 5 minutes and the mouse has taken a beating on my behalf.

BB1 asked if he was OK and BB2 replied, “It’s nothing to do with you,” shooting dark looks in my direction.

What did I do to warrant his loathing?

(wavy watery flash back effect – 30 minutes ago)

BB2: I can’t open this email.

me: Oh. What’s it saying?

BB2: It’s saying something about network preferences not allowing email to be accessed.

me: Have you called I.T.?

BB2: Yeah. They said they couldn’t do anything.

me: Really? Why not?

BB2: He said it was virus software stopping it and they can’t override it.

me: Well, there’s nothing you can do then. What did they suggest?

BB2: To delete it from the system. The problem is it’s an important email. I need it.

me: If it’s work related, call them again and see if there really is nothing they can do.

BB2: I tried that, the second time it was a girl who answered and she said no way could I get it. She was a bit rude actually.

me: Hmmm, OK. What’s the email, I’ll see if I can get them to do something with it.

BB2: Cheers. It’s called “free nude celebrity pics”


me: Fuck off.

BB2: But it’s got Anna Kournikova and Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan…

me: Just. Shut. Up. (you gormless fucking twunt*)


So here we are. I must have been a really mean bastard in my last life!

Will To Live Factor 63.4%

*I really love this word



One Response to “Is This My Nightmare Or Yours?”

  1. hmmm… he sounds like a lovely bloke. 🙂

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